It’s saddening to see many of my students’ struggle with loved ones while they themselves experience transformation and joy as a result of our courses or coaching. Everyone’s on their own journey, it’s just still hard to watch.
So many people have partners that are not on the same path when it comes to learning, growing, goals, intentions, etc., and especially personal development. It’s very tough. This is a huge challenge for many.
One of the things I say to people about our courses and programs is, “I know for an absolute 1,000% fact that we can change your life. Let us teach you, do what we teach, and it’ll work.”
What I can’t control is your environment and who’s around you; the people that are trying to drag you back down from what we build. It’s a very hard problem for us in our business. It’s like we’re throwing you the life preserver and pulling you in, but there’s a crocodile that keeps on trying to pull you down underneath the water.
Remember, environment is stronger than willpower.
It’s easy for a person that’s not doing what you’re doing–and who sees some change in you–to try to bring you back down to their level so that they don’t feel bad about themselves being lower. Instead of being happy for you, they’re thinking, “It’s easier to bring you back down to my level than for me to try to get up to yours.”
“You know what you’re doing is really useless. I don’t know what those courses are all about. That doesn’t work anyway. What are you trying to do, ruin our relationship? Who do you think you are anyhow? Who do you think you’re going to be, the next Rockefeller?”
They’ve got all these ways of trying to diss you, criticize you and demonize you. All that is one word—fear.
It’s fear that they’re going to lose you; fear that they’re not good enough anymore; and fear that they don’t feel good about themselves anymore in comparison to you.
I used to have one student, believe it or not, whose husband got ill every time there happened to be a course coming up. It was unbelievable. After three courses, I said, “This is an old story. What’s with your husband?” She said, “I don’t know. He just happens to be ill.”
I advised her to confront him. She did, telling him that she didn’t believe for a moment that he was doing this intentionally, and she was right. He didn’t know why either.
The fourth time, guess what happened? He got sick again, she hired someone to come over and stay with him, and she came to the course. Lo and behold, he never got sick again. It was all subconscious.
The bottom line is to not let yourself be taken down. How do you do that?
First, do not argue with them. Just say, “Okay. I understand your point. Thank you for sharing that,” and then just keep going. Keep participating in programs and keep doing what you’re doing.
Second, invite them, but don’t pressure them. Invite them in a way that makes them want to come. Don’t convince them.
Offer or ask for it as a birthday present! “I want–for my birthday–for you and I to go to a training together. Would you do that for me?” They’re not going to say no whether you offer it as a present or ask for it as a present. Works as fantastic gifts for kids too!
Your loved ones will be doing it for you. They’re not even thinking about what they’re going to learn. They’re just going to negate that, but then when they get there, they might resonate with it.
Or maybe not, but there’s always a shot.
The point is this kind of conflict comes up all the time among my students. It can become a tremendous source of anxiety and tension, especially if the relationship is already tense (quite often around … you guessed it, money!).
No one wants to have to consider hurting or risking isolation from their love ones, especially when we know we have to keep on pursuing our growth no matter what. With these two simple tools in mind, you don’t have to.
Share your journey with your loved ones and prosper together!
This story is all too familiar. Give us yours. We want to hear from you!
Here’s the perfect program to participate in with a loved one.It’s simple, doable, NOT time consuming, and A LOT of fun.
You can come as my guest for FREE.
For Your Freedom,
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